A group of tired-eyed teens crowd around a table. They are dreading the next class, attempting to stretch out as much of the five or ten minute break they have. One would presume that the teens are joking around, teasing, or at least talking to pass the time. However, a strange phenomenon occurs—silence. All of the adolescents are captivated by the hypnotizing light of their smart phones. Conversation is nonexistent. It feels as if the crowded table is empty. I would know. I religiously participated in this silent honoring of the cell phone screen.
I always wondered why—why were I and the rest of my peers so addicted to constantly being on our phones? Well, deep down I knew the answer to my question—fear and laziness. I was paralyzed to start any form of conversation. I had a fear of being laughed at, saying the wrong thing, or sounding awkward. An easy (and lazy) solution to my phobia was to hide behind my cell phone screen. I wouldn’t look “weird” if I seemed busy on my smart phone. (In reality, when I tried to appear “busy” I would lock and unlock my iPhone multiple times to avoid staring uncomfortably in the distance or, God forbid, initiate a conversation). So, I used my phone as a coping mechanism to avoid dealing with my fear of socializing. It was convenient and effective in building walls to block any form of communication with the people right beside me. However, this wall that I built caused me to feel extremely lonely and unfulfilled. I was upset that I had zero friends at school, but the reality was I made no effort to even try being friendly with the people around me. I was self-conscious and afraid of the negative things they would think of me if I tried to interact with them, so I avoided interacting all together. As a result, I appeared stand-offish, withdrawn, and uninterested in forming friendships, even though I desperately wanted to have friends. I was stuck in a virtual screen instead of reality.
Now, how do we solve this dilemma of being trapped in our “safety nets” of technology? We need to dive head first into reality. Let’s initiate conversations and not care if what we say will make us sound “weird.” Let’s stop obsessively being on our cellphones to combat awkwardness. Let’s see our world and the people in our world through our eyes instead of through the warped view of our cell phone screens. We must disconnect to authentically connect. If we decide to stay in our cell phone comfort zone, we will miss out on so much that life has to offer: possible friendships, thought-provoking conversations, and discovering ourselves through the people we socialize with. Here’s the good news: we CAN escape our “safety nets!” You may be thinking that not using cell phones sounds great, but we need our phones in this day and age. I am not asking you to completely cut out your cell phones. We do need them; however, I am asking you to cut back on your cell phone usage. I challenge you and myself to only use our phones if we need to call for business, family, or emergency. That means no social media, playing Candy Crush, or texting for no reason. If you want to hang out with some-one, call them and set a date instead of texting! Let’s try this challenge for one week. Don’t forget to comment on how your day is different without excessive cell phone use! I’d love to hear your thoughts. So, to close this blog, let’s remember to dive head first into reality, and that we can escape our “safety net” cell phone screens.
Till next time,
Makayla Colonello